they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
