I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
