Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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