Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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