Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
