How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize