Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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