Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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