i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
