I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
