i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize