When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
