new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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