sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
