Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
