the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
This girl is more easily done than said...
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Randomize
