when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
