eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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