My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
