maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize