C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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