We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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