i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
The air was thick with penises
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
