I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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