Capitaan dildo arrescate!
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
