why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
