Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I have feelings that need drinking.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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