is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
