Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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