I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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