Sry I called you an 8
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You left your phone here
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