that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
