I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize