Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
