oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
