whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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