My brain says no but my pants say off.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
