Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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