Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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