Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Fuck me I smell like cheese
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
