Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
