U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
