hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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