Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
MIDGETS
????
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
