She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
