i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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