you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
