chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
