I want to stick my p in your. b.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
