but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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